Crazy

The past week has been crazy. Mostly the not-so-good kind of crazy, but I’m trying to stay positive because I know things could always be worse.  I really felt like I was making progress with regards to the miscarriage. I actually did really well over the holidays. One thing I just haven’t been able to shake, though, is this unrelenting, irrational fear I have that something will happen to Munchkin. I know all parents worry about their kids, but I’m telling you, it’s bad! It keeps me awake at least a couple of nights a week and invades my thoughts so many times during the day that I often lose count. It has been extra-bad this week.

 This week, My sister had a real, very serious scare with her oldest son, and it has me panicking all over again. We got a phone call last Thursday evening that our nephew, Jaime had been airlifted to the Children’s Hospital in Denver and was in very serious condition. The whole family had been sick with the flu, so when Jamie started throwing up a couple days before, everyone assumed that he had finally come down with it too. Only he didn’t get better the next day. Or the next. My sister tried to make sure he stayed hydrated, but by Thursday night she could tell that something was very wrong when he started breathing very hard and his heart started racing. By the time they arrived at the ER, he had become very lethargic as well. The ER nurse ran a few tests including a blood glucose test and discovered that his blood sugar was sky-high and his kidneys were struggling to keep up. They flew him to Denver immediately where fortunately, they were able to stabilize him and start slowly bringing his glucose levels down. They diagnosed him with autoimmune type 1 diabetes.

Munchkin has been such a healthy child that I can’t imagine how terrifying it must have been for my sister to hear the doctors say that her son probably would not have made it through the night if she hadn’t taken him to the ER when she did. I know it scared me and made me physically ill thinking about it, and it wasn’t even my child. Jamie is such a sweet, wonderful kid. The thought of a six-year-old navigating the world of blood sugar testing, needles, and carb-counting is just overwhelming to me, but he has been such a trooper. He will have to have at least 5 injections of insulin every day for the rest of his life, but already, he is taking charge and really getting involved in his own care. My sister says he even insists that he give himself the injections himself! He has been on our minds and in our prayers for sure.

When Munchkin started feeling sick on Friday, I went nuts with worry and took him in to the doctor immediately (actually, it was his first trip to the doctor, with the exception of well-child visits, ever) Fortunately, it was just a bout of the flu. Unfortunately, Stephen and I also caught it and now, a week later, it has very much exceeded its welcome around here. Munchkin spent an entire day vomiting, followed by several days of diarrhea and has yet to fully regain his appetite, but is feeling much better. So much better that actually, I am having a hard time keeping up with his energy level!

Anyways, the worry about diabetes is still haunting me. Kate said that one of the first things the pediatric endocrinologist asked her was about any family history of other autoimmune disorders (you know, like Hashimoto’s hypothyroidism, that my grandma, mom and I ALL HAVE!) since that has been associated with an increased risk of type 1 diabetes. It is freaking me out!  Katie mentioned that she is planning to have all of her other children tested for the antibodies. I am thinking about having Munchkin tested too, but then again, what would that really prove other than possibly freaking me out even more?

Sigh. I would really like for this week to get better before my birthday tomorrow.

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